it's freaking me out how familiar Altea feels. I keep getting this strange feeling that God has plans for me that include so much more than these 2 summers. AHH! That's crazy! I am not saying I will live here but I am also not saying I won't... Hopefully I can just keep coming back each summer.
I already feel like my time is slipping away. That tendency to operate under a ticking clock, in a state of urgency, is creeping up on me again. I need to be praying more and trusting the Lord will move in my friends' lives. And perhaps that is why He is calling me to return beyond just this summer. He knows that there is still work to be done, that I feel unfinished or like I am not redeeming the time. If I come back then I can chill and not rush the Spirit.
One other thing God has super blessed me with these past 2 summers is people who see such potential in me. Last summer it was our staff Carrie, Justin and Arianna who really believed in me in a way I didn't understand. This summer people like Susan and Lisa and Matt and Gracie see the sunshine outta my bum. I hate that I don't see myself with kind eyes. Regardless, they keep speaking beautiful words of encouragement over me. Or even when I make an off hand comment about myself that isn't exactly uplifting they are quick to shoot it down or ask why I think that or who ever told me that. It's been amazing to see barriers in my mind/heart being broken down. To begin to accept the "truth" that God delights in me, that God sees so many good qualities in us, that God is SO long suffering and so gracious and tender and friendly. Even as I write this I am making the connection that this was my prayer last summer Spain. I wanted to see Jesus as tender, to believe that he would say the same loving things as my mom does about me.
Wow, He really likes to use my time in Edge and in Spain for that purpose. I don't know why. Maybe He truly has something big in store for me here and He needs me to walk in confidence and in boldness. Maybe the same concept/truth He wants me to believe He also needs the Spanish to believe and encounter. I guess we'll see.
I super appreciate any prayers you can send my way and on behalf of my Spanish friends.
Okay, I'm done. Hasta luego!